What do you do when a relationship has run its course? We engage in relationships all the time. With other people as well as material objects. A portion of being successful is knowing when a relationship is beneficial to you or if it has become somewhat of a liability; or even better, see when a possible liability is brewing.
I have an old vehicle. It’s a 1995 model with over 220K miles on it. This vehicle has done me well. Of course I have had to replace the tires, brakes, battery, alternator, as well as a few other minor odds-n-ins; and sure the A/C, defrost and cigarette lighter don’t work (it actually has two lighters! neither work), but she has been a trustworthy companion.
I have people like this in my life too. They have served me well and been there through thick and thin. Like my vehicle, they don’t seem to have much more to offer me in the way of getting to my final destination though. I can get a new car tomorrow, but what of people? I need a reliable mode of transportation and I do like to travel in style… I’m still talking about a car, right? What do I owe that old vehicle? What do I owe my old friends?
By the way, I have a beautiful vintage sports car that sits in the driveway ready to roll at a moments notice… just saying.
There was a time when I use to call a friend of mine every Sunday morning. We would talk for an hour or so about nearly nothing; just the things that may be “grinding our gears” at the moment. In that 60 minutes or so we would solve the worlds problems. Funny stories would be shared of he or I in an “Express Lane -12 items or less” confronting the stupid bastard who thought 14 < 12 somehow. Yes, these were very good Sunday mornings.
That certain friend and I do not speak as much as we used to some years ago, but I know we still have the same views on much of life’s little idiosyncrasies. The latest of which I have come into contact with is the innocent lie.
I recently returned to the beautiful home in which I reside; I had been on travel due to a job prospect. It was this job prospect that brought me into contact with the the latest innocent lie. My soon to be new personnel manager acted completely unaware that I was coming. This was a “done deal” over a month ago. I arrived to find the personnel manager and my soon to be functional area supervisor talking about what they could “do” with me. I get paid regardless so if there is no job, I will sit around until they find one or send me somewhere else to get one. Not a big worry for me or as I like to put it: “Doesn’t boogey me none” The lie came when the personnel manager explained he had know idea I was coming until the day prior… lie. He new six weeks ago. My new supervisor confirmed that they knew six weeks ago. So why didn’t they plan accordingly or at least let me know there was no job? Why scramble now to find me a job as the realization sits in that I am going to get paid for doing nothing? Not that I mind getting paid for doing nothing (best work yet), but why lie to me? Why did he lie?
See, here is the “kicker”… the man who just lied to me is a very well respected man in his field. He is an honorable man known for producing amazing results. This man’s integrity is with out question. However, it is this same man who just began our relationship on a lie. Albeit an innocent lie thrown about for not wanting to be seen with his “professional” pants down but this relationship has begun on a lie.
Should I be offended? If you have never sat and watched “It’s The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown” then please stop reading this right now, go find the nearest available recording of “It’s The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown”, and watch. If you are just too drawn to my writing skills or have already viewed said program then this little excerpt comes to mind. I don’t mind his dishonesty half as much as I mind his opinion of me to either group me with liars and cheats or to think I might be so stupid as to not see through his lie. I am offended.
Now, the just desserts I do get to enjoy comes in this fashion; I now know he’s a liar. I know he will lie about nothing, really. Whatever can I do with this? Whatever should I do?